{"product_id":"i-got-my-appendix-removed-at-claires-lighter","title":"I Got My Appendix Removed at Claire's Lighter","description":"\u003ch2 style=\"color: #FF0000;\"\u003eI Got My Appendix Removed at Claire's Lighter: Sarcastic Mall Nostalgia Lighter\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe I Got My Appendix Removed at Claire's Lighter brings peak early-2000s suburban mall chaos straight to your pocket. Featuring bold bubblegum-pink typography running vertically down a sleek black chassis, it commemorates surviving an era when teenagers armed with questionable piercing guns held unchecked authority over your body mods. Whether you actually braved a sketchy cartilage piercing between the glitter gloss racks or simply appreciate unhinged medical satire, this lighter turns everyday mall nostalgia into a deadpan punchline.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEngineered for dependable everyday carry, this disposable lighter features a durable, lightweight plastic body rated for up to 2,000 reliable lights. It complies with strict ISO 9994 and CPSC 11228 safety standards, delivering smooth flame ignition and consistent performance for candles, campfires, or smoke breaks. Compact, functional, and impossible to overlook, it also ensures sticky-fingered friends will never accidentally steal your flame again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3 style=\"color: #FF0000;\"\u003eI Got My Appendix Removed at Claire's Lighter Specifications:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/strong\u003e 3.2\" H x 0.89\" W x 0.4\" D\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eProduct:\u003c\/strong\u003e Novelty disposable lighter\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMaterial:\u003c\/strong\u003e Durable plastic chassis\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCapacity:\u003c\/strong\u003e Rated for approximately 2,000 lights\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eRefillable:\u003c\/strong\u003e No (disposable)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSafety:\u003c\/strong\u003e ISO 9994 \u0026amp; CPSC 11228 certified\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTheme:\u003c\/strong\u003e Mall nostalgia \/ medical satire \/ dark humor\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"The Original Underground","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53519857582447,"sku":"APPENDIXCLAIRESLIGHTERV2042826","price":3.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0945\/4469\/1567\/files\/IGotMyAppendix_Front.jpg?v=1790127687","url":"https:\/\/houseplantshop.store\/products\/i-got-my-appendix-removed-at-claires-lighter","provider":"House Plant Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}